Marketing Moms

The Myth of More: Questioning the Constant Push for Growth | MM#141

• Jessie Valle & Angela Reeder • Episode 141

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In this episode, Jessie and Angela discuss the unrealistic expectations for constant growth in the mom entrepreneur space, especially in American culture. It critiques the pressure to achieve six or seven-figure incomes, emphasizing the importance of personal fulfillment and balance over financial success. They explore how these societal pressures conflict with the desire for a balanced life as a mom and business owner. They advocate for appreciating personal achievements and maintaining business satisfaction without succumbing to the relentless pursuit of growth. The conversation also touches on the distinction between being content with one's business and the constant push for expansion, emphasizing the importance of personal relationships and life satisfaction over mere financial gain.


**ANNOUNCEMENT** After nearly 3 years, the Marketing Moms podcast is sunsetting. Thank you so much for the unwavering support, well-wishes, and memories. This has been the experience of a lifetime <3
It's coffee time!
Jessie & Angela



00:00.00
Angela
Hey everyone thanks for joining us today. We are going to be talking about the myth of more questioning the constant push for growth. Okay.

00:43.21
Angela
Go for 6 figures. Go for 7 figures and go for a heat. Ah I feel like there's yes exactly I feel like there's no end to the push for.

00:48.48
jessievalle
And become the next billionaire along with Taylor Swift

00:59.74
Angela
Bigger and better and more especially in like the mom entrepreneur space. This idea that like oh you can just it's the 6 figure stirring nap time thing like that you can just have all of this and also.

01:14.49
jessievalle
Um.

01:19.59
Angela
Have all of the time and the two things are not mutually exclusive.

01:22.51
jessievalle
Yeah, and I also think it's a definite part of the American culture.

01:30.81
Angela
Um, oh yeah, for sure that definitely.

01:32.19
jessievalle
I Mean not that I know much about a lot of the other cultures in the world. But I just see them taking life more slowly and for us it's push push push go go go all the time Sunup sundown past sun.

01:44.79
Angela
Um, yeah.

01:51.55
Angela
Yes.

01:52.00
jessievalle
Before Sunrise and after sundown you are push push push push pushing who needs sleep do more if you have time do more be more have more.

01:57.21
Angela
Right? Yeah, exactly Well and the the idea of you have to do more and be more to be valued or to like to be worthy of taking up space especially in the online space. It's like if you're not making.

02:06.93
jessievalle
Mean.

02:16.35
Angela
You know a million dollars a month. Nobody wants to give you space to listen or to contribute. It's just this idea of more money somehow equals more validation.

02:20.40
jessievalle
In here.

02:30.75
jessievalle
Authority. It's ridiculous guess what Angela and I are currently making $0 on this podcast because we like it.

02:33.86
Angela
And more authority. Yeah.

02:46.13
jessievalle
And guess what we have plenty of experience validation authority and it just blows my mind that yeah it that's just silly.

02:50.20
Angela
Um, yes, ah, it goes back a little bit to the because I am like an 80 s baby it goes back to that like the 90 s idea where if um, a woman wanted to just stay at home and be ah, a stay at home mom it was somehow like not enough like they were not fulfilling their potential or not. You know they weren't dreaming big enough and I feel like now that we've kind of gotten over that idea that like if you want to be a stay at home mom you just.

03:27.33
jessievalle
In.

03:28.27
Angela
Can ah it's it's like a continuation of that where it's like well you can be a stay at home mom but you should also run a 6 figure business from home. But.

03:37.85
jessievalle
Yeah I think it's also difficult because in today's economy it is very difficult to have a 1 ne-income household but that doesn't mean that.

03:44.66
Angela
E.

03:50.72
Angela
Um, yes, yeah.

03:57.45
jessievalle
The income the that both parents honestly I don't want to just like single out moms but it doesn't mean that either income has to be 6 figures or 7 figures.

04:03.49
Angela
Um, right? right? Well and honestly, if like if both parents had like regular full time jobs working for someone. Nobody's. Shoving down their throat that they should be making 6 figures like sure you might get the occasional like oh yeah, go for that promotion but like nobody is telling them like oh you know you only make this much that's not really enough like you're not really enough.

04:23.52
jessievalle
It's true I mean.

04:36.30
jessievalle
I mean it. That's that's a really great point and I think about when I was a teacher like no one questioned, they just knew I didn't make a lot of money. Ah I mean and that's sad because I know teachers who would like.

04:38.45
Angela
The way we do with like online entrepreneurs.

04:49.39
Angela
Um, right? yeah.

04:54.74
jessievalle
Back groceries on the weekends and evenings and um, a lot of them were into the mlms selling things and doing parties on the evenings and weekends and a lot of teachers just couldn't have 1 job and that stunk and that's what I do like about.

05:03.15
Angela
Um, right.

05:09.38
Angela
Bright.

05:14.85
jessievalle
Switching to entrepreneurship is I can have just 1 job and that in and of itself is less stressful but also it's on your own terms and so you can.

05:17.54
Angela
Um, in.

05:22.40
Angela
Yes.

05:32.78
jessievalle
I Think the hard thing is is. It's that glow of potential and it's really hard for a lot of entrepreneurs to stay away from that like I could be more and do more and have more but guess what you have to sacrifice to get that and us as moms.

05:36.40
Angela
Yeah.

05:45.89
Angela
Yeah.

05:50.36
jessievalle
A lot of the time are not willing to sacrifice our families and watching our kids grow up just for an extra couple bucks right now.

05:58.63
Angela
And right well and for a lot of moms with businesses that was the whole point of getting into business and getting into the online business like I started my business so that I could be home with my kids like.

06:15.31
jessievalle
Um, same.

06:16.18
Angela
I Don't want to sacrifice time with my kids to make a 6 figure income like I just want to like bring in enough money to cover the bills and put my kids in gymnastics or whatever soccer um like that's enough for me and the idea that that being enough. Is somehow not okay, like really really bothers me like nobody ever talks about. Okay, you've got your business where you want it Now. What do you do like here's here's where to go from here. It's always.

06:41.30
jessievalle
Um, yeah.

06:46.37
jessievalle
Yeah, no because oh no, they talk about it. They talk about it. It's just hey let's take to the next level. Yeah.

06:54.40
Angela
Growth. Yes, it's always let's make it bigger like if you are a freelancer and you've got your business where you want it? Well now it's time to become an agency if you're an agency and you got your business where you want you need to hire more people like it's that constant state of growth and not a like okay here's where you're at.

07:04.67
jessievalle
Um.

07:12.80
Angela
This is what you wanted. How are we maintaining that like what are you you know what are you filling your time with instead. There's never that conversation. It's just like oh good you hit that checkbox time to move on to the next one like I don't.

07:19.73
jessievalle
Um, yeah.

07:30.47
Angela
Want to.

07:31.81
jessievalle
Ah, who said that that's my next checkbox.

07:34.53
Angela
Right? Who said I want any more checkboxes or that I want anymore right now like maybe when all my kids are grown sure I might want something more I want might want to put more into my business but like my goal for my business.

07:41.54
jessievalle
Ah I It's true.

07:53.64
Angela
Before my kids were all in school was really different than my goal for my business after my kids were in school but they were both equally valid goals and when I got to that first goal it wasn't like oh there's the checkbox got to start working for the second one it was like nope.

07:58.22
jessievalle
And.

08:10.13
Angela
This is where I'm at this is where I wanted to be I can just be here for a while and then when circumstances changed and I found myself wanting a bit more out of my business then I felt ready to put more into my business but it wasn't like okay you hit this. Income Mark let's go for the next one like no breathing room. No time to just enjoy the thing you have. It's like if you're not hustling and grinding and making yourself miserable in your business then you don't really get to call yourself an entrepreneur.

08:33.25
jessievalle
Good.

08:42.21
jessievalle
Yeah, that's ridiculous I It's really hard because especially here in this American culture. We put so much emphasis on material things.

08:55.53
Angela
Is this.

08:58.83
jessievalle
But sometimes you just need to step back and question that and say wait a minute. What is it that I actually want and have I achieved that and if I have how can I just ride it out and enjoy it for a while.

09:04.74
Angela
He.

09:14.16
Angela
Yeah, absolutely I think this idea of going back to. Why did you start your business. What was the original point. What was it that you wanted.

09:31.65
jessievalle
Um.

09:33.14
Angela
How is that different than what you want now of what you want now is a 6 figure then 7 figure then 8 figure business go for it. But for a lot of us. It was I want something to bring in income. So I and also be home with my kids I want to be able to stay home on 2 hour delay days and not have to worry about.

09:38.65
jessievalle
You.

09:52.91
Angela
Getting my kids off to school and getting to work on time I Want to be able to drop everything go pick up my sick kid at the doctor like those were my business goals. It had nothing to do with income. Like the income was good and I did want to make you know a certain level of money. Not like a certain dollar amount like a certain level of money but it wasn't about the money and it wasn't about the growth. It was about those bigger goals that I had.

10:18.51
jessievalle
Is the.

10:25.81
Angela
And how I fit my business into my life and I feel like a lot of the marketing today is more about fitting your life around your business and making that like your whole identity like I feel like a lot of marketers are kind of like I'm a business owner and a mom and it's like the whole. Their whole identity and even including being a mom is like wrapped around their business as like part of a marketing tactic and which is fine like I'm not judging anybody. But it's just a weird concept and a weird thing to push on people like. I'm a mom but I don't need to leverage that to like make more money I just want to have my business and be with my family.

11:10.50
jessievalle
Yeah I think it's interesting because I think I feel like and this may not be true. It is a personal opinion but I feel like all of these are personal opinions.

11:25.39
Angela
Um, yes, all of these are personal opinions.

11:29.80
jessievalle
I Feel like a lot of the people online who are influencers who are boasting push for more were born entrepreneurs like they have that entrepreneurial spirit they have that desire because that's what they thrive on.

11:35.52
Angela
A yes.

11:47.82
Angela
Yes, yeah.

11:49.61
jessievalle
Let's try a new venture. Let's try to go for the next checkbox and that's fun to them. That's what drives them That's their personality. They were born that way a lot of us marketing moms out. There are not born. Entrepreneurs are not.

12:03.60
Angela
Right.

12:06.62
jessievalle
We just have our little goals for our little families and that's that and when we listen to those crazy influencers online I don't mean crazy I mean I mean passionate when we listen to those passionate Yes, over the top.

12:17.76
Angela
Um, yes, passionate and over the top.

12:24.75
jessievalle
Passionate influencers online. We can't compare ourselves to them because we are not the same I never in 1000000 years thought I would be running my own business and truth be told at the end of the day I'm not just running my own business I am also ah an employee for a company.

12:29.42
Angela
Yes.

12:41.66
Angela
Yeah.

12:43.29
jessievalle
Because I thrive there I'm a really good employee not that I'm not a good business owner but that was never my calling but that doesn't mean that I can't do a little bit on the side.

12:48.20
Angela
Right? Yeah, it's yeah and I feel like there should be space in the online industry for those people like 4 people like us that are like I just have my business. And I'm happy with that and maybe I want to grow a little bit. Maybe I just want to maintain what I have but like here give me the skills and strategies to do that instead of telling me that what I have isn't enough or shouldn't be enough for me or that. I'm somehow not good enough because I don't want more like and it does go back. A lot of it to especially the american cultural expectations. Um, and the the drive for more.

13:29.44
jessievalle
In here.

13:37.34
jessievalle
Here.

13:43.49
Angela
Material things and more money and part of it I think too is that idea that like having more money means having more stability and that's true but also like you can really really wreck a lot of. Parts of your life if all you're focused on is bringing in more money like there's definitely it used to be 70000 but I think it's gone up now because of inflation and stuff but that used to be they would say that was like the cap of general.

14:04.90
jessievalle
M.

14:19.13
Angela
Happiness and satisfaction with life like once you got past $70000 a year like the the return on investment for making more money didn't bring in as much happiness like you just couldn't really get that much happier with more money now I'm sure that's. Not counting like billionaires I feel like I would have more happiness with $1000000000 than $70000 but in in general yeah, that's true. Yeah yeah.

14:44.10
jessievalle
I Don't know I don't know because you know a lot of people say I mean there are a lot of celebrities that are very dissatisfied with their lives because money's not everything.

14:57.92
Angela
There's definitely a cap of making money and being happy like where that grid you know falls off and I don't know where it's at now. But it's there and I feel like it's the same thing in our businesses like for everybody and it's different for everybody.

15:03.56
jessievalle
Yeah.

15:16.46
Angela
There's a cap of making a certain amount of income and being happy where once you cross that threshold you're just making yourself miserable to make more money and you've kind of forgotten all of the reasons that you started your business.

15:27.21
jessievalle
Yeah.

15:34.81
jessievalle
Yeah, it reminds me of that that lifelong study about ah they followed people throughout their lives measuring their happiness and at the end of their lives The happiest.

15:45.75
Angela
Okay.

15:51.30
jessievalle
Most fulfilled people were the ones with the strongest personal relationships. It had absolutely nothing to do with what job they had their income um their life like so like their living conditions. It was all about their relationships and their people.

15:56.81
Angela
Yeah.

16:10.75
jessievalle
So I don't want us marketing moms to lose sight of our relationships and what truly matters in life for happiness just to boast another checkbox.

16:13.85
Angela
Over.

16:25.79
Angela
Right? Yeah I I just started the book the subtle art of not giving a whatever that I won't say because we have moms with kids listening to this podcast but in the the first part of the book. The first chapter of the book.

16:33.78
jessievalle
Um, oh I've heard that's a good one.

16:43.68
Angela
And what really hooked me is it talks about that idea of being focused on what you don't have and caring about what you don't have so caring about being more fit making more money having a bigger house like when you focus On. All of the things you don't have makes you feel very inadequate whereas if you can focus on the things you do have and the things that are going Well it makes it easier to put like the the gap between what you have and what you want into perspective because you're not looking at these influencers.

17:03.28
jessievalle
E.

17:19.66
Angela
Making $100000 a week like you're happy with what you have here's what you want There's a tiny little gap. There. You don't feel overwhelmed and you can just you know, go on about your day whereas if all you're focused on is. Um, my gosh this influencer making so much money or this person has a giant house or this person gets to go on vacation every year like then it feels really inadequate and frustrating and you know, unfulfilling.

17:48.43
jessievalle
Yeah I was reading a book recently and it was talking about how what you focus on grows and yeah, exactly like if you focus on the things you have and the things you're grateful for those things will expand.

17:56.64
Angela
And then.

18:06.60
Angela
Okay.

18:07.55
jessievalle
So If you're grateful for being able to be with your family and like it will start to expand and you'll find yourself with more and more time for your family and it just yeah, it's It's hard because. The biggest thing to me is just recognizing that. What other people are saying online is not a requirement for you and it's about taking a step back and really thinking about what you want.

18:34.26
Angela
In here.

18:44.28
jessievalle
And Angela and I surprise are writing our second book and in that book we are going to go over all the ways that you can.

18:51.60
Angela
Um, yeah.

18:59.52
Angela
Yes.

19:04.20
jessievalle
Maintain and slow grow your business when you reach that point of satisfaction so that you have the capacity and even more capacity to to hopefully do the things you wanted to do outside of your business. And not have your life revolve around your business.

19:21.96
Angela
Um, yes, yeah I think 1 thing I would really like to see happen in our industry and I say our industry but I really just mean moms with online businesses because we're all in different. You know quote unquote industries. But in our sector of the internet. 1 thing that I would really like to see is a bigger acceptance of small business moms freelancers and moms that are just kind of okay with where they're at they're not. Chasing the next whatever digit in in your income. They're just you know focusing on their families focusing on what they want and enjoying life and I really like to see a bigger acceptance of that in our space online and.

20:01.83
jessievalle
Um, with that.

20:16.60
Angela
And an acknowledgement of that that not everybody is trying to make a million dollars I

20:23.70
jessievalle
Agreed well said Clap Clap. Ah, ah, all right? Well we are excited to continue this conversation and also discussing different ways where now that we've Established. We don't need to constantly grow grow grow. How can we maintain that business and so I'm excited that our upcoming episodes are really going to be a lot about that and.

20:42.19
Angela
Um, yes.

20:47.41
Angela
In the.

20:50.83
jessievalle
Figuring out ways that we can maintain and slow grow the business that we've established without killing ourselves and really allowing us the space to pull back and remember why we started our business and actually start enjoying it instead of dreading the hustle and the push. So.

21:03.78
Angela
Yes.

21:10.12
jessievalle
Wheel cha. Ah chalk. We'll talk and chat ah next week by.

21:13.80
Angela
Chalk.

21:19.44
Angela
Bye.