Marketing Moms

Goal-Setting vs Goal-Stressing for Busy Moms | MM#126

• Episode 126

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In this podcast episode, Jessie and Angela discuss the challenges and potential benefits of structured journaling and goal-setting for busy moms. They critique a one-page productivity planner by high-performance coach Brendan Burchard, questioning its practicality for moms who have limited time. The episode explores the psychology behind such productivity methods and suggests that they may not be one-size-fits-all solutions. They advocate for more flexible, personalized approaches, such as focusing on one question per day or using visual reminders to prompt reflection. Overall, the episode emphasizes the importance of realistic and forgiving methods for busy moms to manage their lives without feeling overwhelmed or inadequate.

**ANNOUNCEMENT** After nearly 3 years, the Marketing Moms podcast is sunsetting. Thank you so much for the unwavering support, well-wishes, and memories. This has been the experience of a lifetime <3
It's coffee time!
Jessie & Angela



00:02.14
jessievalle
Heyall today. We're going to kind of continue a little bit of our conversation from last week and talk about journaling and 1 pagegers and if setting goals and goal setting is really. Right for the busy mom.

00:53.60
jessievalle
You know how when you say something out loud like you'll start to get ads for it like your phone is always listening to you. That's how I feel right now.

01:00.72
Angela
Yes, yes.

01:09.52
jessievalle
I know that we've been discussing just morning routines and being organized and how busy moms can implement that kind of thing and today as I was taking a look at Instagram an ad popped up from Brendan Burchard about a 1 page. Productivity planner now Brendan Burchard is like a 3 time New York Times bestselling author he has the book high performance habits. He's basically a life coach for high performers right? and so he's. You know, been interviewed by Oprah Forbes Larry King like all the things and so he's just like a yeah life coach high performance coach. He's a big deal for high performers. So.

02:00.28
Angela
He's a big deal right.

02:07.86
jessievalle
He was offering this free 1 page productivity download and of course as any good salesperson does when you get something free. They offer something paid on the backend which we could definitely have another conversation about the marketing tactics. But that's not what this episode is about.

02:19.79
Angela
Oh.

02:28.41
jessievalle
Um, it was interesting because I went ahead and signed up for the free 1 pager because I was like okay well what would he say in this one pager and I was actually shocked.

02:42.53
jessievalle
I opened it up and I was telling Angela about it and I'm like we got it. We got to have a conversation about this on air and we got to talk about this one of the big things is that I understand why you do it for people who sell things.

02:43.45
Angela
Ah.

02:47.82
Angela
We have to have its um.

03:02.10
jessievalle
There's a sort of psychology of teaching people that your way is the way like it's the only way and Angela and I are here to tell you realistically candidly that there are many ways to reach the same goals.

03:06.39
Angela
Yes.

03:20.63
jessievalle
And different people need different paths to that same goal and so I'm going to talk about this knowing full. Well that it's not for everyone but then also coming back to us as busy moms. So first let me describe what this is unless you have something to add before I go on.

03:20.98
Angela
Yep.

03:32.44
Angela
Yeah.

03:39.67
Angela
Nope have at it.

03:40.43
jessievalle
Okay, cool. So the first thing is you put the date you write a message to yourself which okay, cool message myself I've got today's top 3 goals things that must be done today and people I need to reach out to.

03:47.27
Angela
Yeah, right.

03:58.31
jessievalle
Okay, that alone is going to take me ten fifteen minutes ah then I go through a 10 question morning mindset list.

03:59.37
Angela
Yeah, that's going to be a bit. Yeah.

04:09.53
Angela
See That's the part where they lost me.

04:14.42
jessievalle
I mean I understand that it could just be like 1 word answers but I am not a fan and Angela and are totally guilty of this. We've created a journal in the past and.

04:19.88
Angela
Oh.

04:33.42
jessievalle
Used it for a while and then we stopped. We've tried other things in the past we use it for a while and we stop and for me one of the reasons is if it asks too much of you and also it's too repetitive like I can't so.

04:33.44
Angela
Me yeah.

04:47.72
Angela
Yes.

04:51.99
jessievalle
Side note when we interviewed Kara Sharon for our marketing mom's monthly podcast. Um in membership she told us about her be the best you gratitude journals and I still use it because I absolutely love the fact that every day is different.

04:55.18
Angela
Yeah.

05:06.74
Angela
Me too. Yes, that was the thing that really got me about her gratitude Journal that every day was different and I was pleasantly surprised by that because I did not expect it.

05:14.29
jessievalle
Um, exactly yeah I love that. But anyway back to this one page productivity high performance planner I mean it's got things like.

05:28.93
jessievalle
A situation that might stress me out or trip me up today could be blank and the way that my best self would deal with that is blank I know it's good to have a plan for the bad things. But I don't want to sit there and come up with what could go wrong every day I don't feel like that's the best use of my time. So anyway, then there's a spot where you can write like it's your daily calendar so you write in your whole daily calendar and then there's.

05:49.47
Angela
Um, right.

06:02.38
jessievalle
A 6 question evening journal and a scorecard where you rate yourself 1 through 5 on 6 different areas on how you did that day.

06:11.24
Angela
Okay I see I see the purpose in reflecting on the day like I do see that and I know that it's valuable to like go back and reflect on your goals and how your day went but I can guarantee I'm not going to remember to do that.

06:16.10
jessievalle
A.

06:27.43
jessievalle
Is.

06:29.26
Angela
Every like certainly not in a structured way I might remember to like kind of mentally go back over it. But I'm not going to remember to do that in a structured way, especially not at bedtime with my kids.

06:39.72
jessievalle
Something else? Oh yeah, something else I realized is there might be ways to implement pieces of this without doing the whole thing we mentioned on our last episode that if you set yourself up.

06:50.90
Angela
Or.

06:58.63
jessievalle
For too rigorous a morning routine especially when you fail you've already hit yourself down. You've already knocked yourself down and you just woke up I don't want to set you up for failure I don't want to set you up to make you feel like you're not enough first thing in the morning because you can't fill out.

06:59.91
Angela
Oh yeah.

07:17.52
jessievalle
Ah, 10 question morning mindset and messages to yourself and top 3 goals and tasks that need to be done and people you need to reach out to just saying it is long enough. Ah so what I would say is a definite for Angela I think her ah her.

07:22.64
Angela
Right? or.

07:34.72
Angela
Yeah, my pet was funny and I had to take a picture I didn't realize my sound was on sorry.

07:37.64
jessievalle
Pets doing something funny and she literally just turned around and took a picture of like what are you doing.

07:47.53
jessievalle
Ah, anyway, um I don't want to set you up for failure. But maybe there's a way that you can take just the pieces or implement it in a different way that's helpful for you. So me. For example, you might be the type of person that sits down for an.

08:00.90
Angela
Right.

08:06.80
jessievalle
Hour to fill this out while drinking your morning coffee cool. That's not me I can sit down realistically 5 minutes tops maybe and that's while I'm waiting for the dog to go potty or something you know so.

08:11.30
Angela
No.

08:20.69
Angela
Are.

08:25.60
jessievalle
If I'm thinking about this for myself. Maybe it's just picking one of those questions each day and thinking about it.

08:35.63
Angela
Yeah, instead of writing it down.

08:39.30
jessievalle
Yeah, not even writing it down. It's I'm just gonna randomly pick and today I'm gonna answer 1 bold action I could take today is blank cool I could do that or same thing at night you talked about not remembering to do that. What what? if.

08:46.85
Angela
Yeah.

08:58.77
jessievalle
You printed those 6 questions out and you had them hanging on the wall by your bed. Could you not just walk up pick one of those questions and think about it as you fell asleep.

09:06.33
Angela
Um, yeah, think about it I could do that I don't think I could do it in the like sit down and write it out structured way but I could definitely remember to like mentally reflect on it.

09:13.38
jessievalle
Here.

09:20.89
jessievalle
And even if you don't answer one of those 6 questions. It's still ah a reminder to let me reflect like how did today go what is something that went awesome today and how would I have handled a situation differently that happened today just having even if it's not. A post of those questions on the wall like what if you just put a little sticker on your bedpost or something you know or a little token some people like those gratitude rocks you know things like that. Just.

09:45.90
Angela
Yeah.

09:54.63
Angela
Ah, yes.

09:57.41
jessievalle
Something to remind you to stop and think for a moment.

10:02.16
Angela
Yeah, yeah, I like that and I think there's a lot to be said for things like the 1 page productivity thing. We're talking about where it certainly gives you a lot of options. And it like you said, if you're the kind of person that can sit down and fill the whole thing out and then remember to do it again in the evening good on you. But if you're not things like that can feel frustrating and overwhelming if you feel like you have to do them all every day.

10:20.24
jessievalle
Um.

10:33.91
jessievalle
Yeah, some of the planners we've.

10:36.74
Angela
But if you break it up or you take pieces of it that work that can be a little bit less overwhelming.

10:43.66
jessievalle
Yeah, some of the planners we've had in the past I feel guilty spending money on and then not using it like that's why it's It's tough because.

10:51.69
Angela
Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

11:00.82
jessievalle
There's always going to be people who need that you might be the person that needs that cool. But as busy moms of growing children. It is.

11:02.60
Angela
Right.

11:10.72
Angela
I have.

11:15.33
jessievalle
Really hard for Angela and I right now so we can imagine other moms being in the same position. It's really hard to so to say I'm going to sit down and journal like really okay, again coming from an older man who who knows.

11:25.25
Angela
Um, right right? who may or may not have children.

11:33.46
jessievalle
I Don't even know if he has kids and if he does how involved he is and if they're older and they don't need his attention as much like his point in life is different than my point in life. So it's really hard to create the way.

11:37.90
Angela
Right.

11:45.94
Angela
Right. Yeah, and I think part of the frustration that I find with people that you know say oh I've tried this planner and that planner and I've done this and I've done that program is that.

11:53.33
jessievalle
For everyone.

12:10.30
Angela
Like you said earlier everybody for good reason but everybody markets like this is the only way it has to be done exactly my way in order to work and this is the only way it can work and so when you've gone through.

12:15.70
jessievalle
A.

12:26.59
Angela
Program after program after program and planner after planner after planner and nothing's working. It's really it can really feel like what's wrong with me. Well, nothing's wrong with you. It's just that nobody can come up with a way that works for everybody all the time and if you can't find a way to adapt.

12:40.55
jessievalle
The.

12:46.00
Angela
And recognize what does work for you. You're just going to keep being frustrated.

12:51.73
jessievalle
Um.

12:56.50
jessievalle
Yeah, so I guess this up and ah the the this episode can be a little shorter today because I just wanted to be a reminder that your way.

13:01.20
Angela
Um, who yeah.

13:12.60
jessievalle
Doesn't have to be the same as the next person and the best way to do anything is the way that works best for you.

13:13.37
Angela
Um, right.

13:17.95
Angela
Yeah, and it's okay, if you have to take pieces of a program or a planner or a something and make that work for you like you are probably not going to find a planner if you're a planner person that's going to completely 100% work for you.

13:28.41
jessievalle
Who.

13:37.87
Angela
There may be parts of it. You just have to ignore and like be okay with that. Um you know or you may have a couple programs sitting in your teachable school or something that you've been ah, avoiding because. They feel overwhelming. Maybe you can go in there and find pieces of those that are going to help you and just kind of keep in mind that it it doesn't have to be all or nothing.

13:56.15
jessievalle
The.

14:08.47
Angela
Um.

14:21.88
jessievalle
I I'm no more I'm over here actually looking at oh okay, so marketing momspodcast.com forwardd slash balance

14:37.88
Angela
Yes.

14:41.30
jessievalle
That's where you can get our free balance journal.

14:45.00
Angela
Yes, and hopefully there will be some pieces in there that will help you.

14:51.12
jessievalle
Um, but again, it's not something that we're telling you you have to use the whole thing like you can just use pieces of it.

14:59.78
Angela
Right? um.

15:04.20
jessievalle
But if you are someone and Angela and I were just actually mentioning that as well I asked her since there's this we've talked about the power sheets in the past and it's this really big year-long journal notebook planner.

15:20.17
Angela
Bobo.

15:22.96
jessievalle
That we used to buy every single year the day it came out because we were so obsessed ah part of that is because they're so pretty you love carrying them around. But then we realized after the high of the purchase.

15:25.58
Angela
Um, the day it came out and.

15:31.97
Angela
Um, they are. They're very crazy. Um, yes.

15:40.83
jessievalle
The dopamine hit ends. What were we left with well we were left with something that we would only fill out a few times a year versus weekly and.

15:49.19
Angela
Bright.

15:53.89
jessievalle
We came to the decision that we were going to stop purchasing them and create our own balance Journal which we did and then eventually we stopped using that as well and it made me step back and be like we made what we said we wanted. Why aren't we using it.

16:01.31
Angela
Um.

16:06.85
Angela
Right? yeah.

16:12.50
jessievalle
And I think it really just came down to it was too much for us at this time in our life. Not that it's not useful and not that some people aren't going to find it useful Check it out yourself. It's free marketing Moms Podcast Dot Com Slash balance.

16:16.61
Angela
Um, yeah, yeah.

16:25.16
Angela
It's free. Yeah, and there are still parts of it I think are useful even in this season but it's a whole thing is not. You know is a bit much for the season that.

16:32.27
jessievalle
A.

16:42.59
Angela
We're in.

16:43.44
jessievalle
Um, right? So I would just I would say that you should just sit down and think about what you need right now and maybe it's like we said, maybe it's.

16:55.33
Angela
Oh.

17:00.59
jessievalle
1 question a day at some point in your 24 hours sit down for 5 minutes and answer 1 question. Maybe it's that.

17:00.71
Angela
Yeah.

17:18.70
jessievalle
Just something to bring you back to how you want to live your life and not get caught up in the stress of work that doesn't matter the stress of the neighborhood drama.

17:25.80
Angela
Right.

17:37.25
jessievalle
The stress of the family drama but just bringing it back to you and how you want to live your life and how you want to present that to your children and beyond here you go.

17:40.83
Angela
Um, if.

17:51.95
Angela
Yep, Progress not perfection.

17:56.83
jessievalle
Crime. So I guess that's what we would say today is think about that and then if you'd like check out our free ballad journal over at marketing mom's podcast dot com forward slash balance until next week ah e